How I feel 3 weeks postpartum

So it has been 3 weeks since I arrived in hospital at half 7 in the morning and an hour later I had my second son I will call H.

So now I had a chance to sort of settle (yeah right) with two kids (toddler and newborn) how do I feel? 

Well…

I don’t want to whine because I love my life I really do but wow everything is hectic and overwhelming and I will admit now when they are both crying or I have had a bad night I do get a little teary and I am like why is my life so hard! 

All he’s I am still feeling teary not completely but things set me off and i find myself crying like today making pancakes and they went badly wrong I cried.

I am also feeling tremendous guilt for my newborn because I feel I don’t spend enough time holding him.and interacting with him and I feel guilt with my toddler because I can’t spend as much time with him now and all these feelings are overwhelming and the house work is overwhelming and not having any time to myself is stressful so that is how I feel.
Rant over…
<div style=’width:100%;text-align:center;’><span style=’margin:5px;padding:5px;border-radius: 5px;border:1px solid lightgrey;display:inline-block;’><a  rel=_nofollow href=’https://talesfrommamaville.com/’&gt;           <img style=’border: 1px solid gray;width:150px;height:150px;’ src=’http://talesfrommamaville.com/wp-content/uploads/2019/02/itsok-featured-badge-jacqui.jpg’&gt;           <p style=’align: center;’>Tales from Mamaville</p></a></span>

Why I feel guilty again

So mum guilt never goes. I have figured this out in the year my 1 year old has been alive. Am I spending enough time with him? Have I just let him watch too much TV again? Why does the house look so messy etc etc.

Now my new baby is born I have a new kind of guilt not with the newborn nope with my now 1 year old. I know everyone loves new babies and wants to come and see them when you come into work but thwy completely ignore my 1 year old who is in the front part of the pram. It wouldn’t be so bad but all, of these people used to come over to him and say hello and he got all of the attention but now no one even says hello to baby J and heads straight for the back. The guilt I feel for this is really bad that I usually go and cuddle him but with my newborn as I am breast feeding he is quite demanding and I feel I spend more time with the newborn than my 1 year old and this makes me feel so bad the guilt swallow me whole and is the worse feeling in the world.

So a message to people that want to ogle at my newborn please give my 1 year old attention too.

<div style='width:100%;text-align:center;'><span style='margin:5px;padding:5px;border-radius: 5px;border:1px solid lightgrey;display:inline-block;'><a  rel=_nofollow href='https://themumconundrum.com'>           <img style='border: 1px solid gray;width:250px;height:250px;' src='https://themumconundrum.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/10/Its-OK-logo-newest.png'>           <p style='align: center;'>The Mum Conundrum</p></a></span>

Coping with a newborn and a almost toddler

So yay I finally had the baby!!

When or in my case if I get time I will try to post my birth story. So what I want to talk about today is how I am coping with both of them.

So my newborn screams a lot I know thats not a big surprise but it then wakes up my 1 year old and when they both start crying I feel my brain cells die out. Its so hard to get them both back to sleep because our 1 year old seems to compete to be the loudest and the baby needs feeding and looking after every couple of hours.

I wouldn’t though be able to do any of this without my husband who shares everything with me 50/50. He has been absolutely great Co parenting our 2 kids I know its only been a week but I do feel we might have this as stressful as it is we will be okay.


The Mum Conundrum <div style='width:100%;text-align:center;'><span style='margin:5px;padding:5px;border-radius: 5px;border:1px solid lightgrey;display:inline-block;'><a rel=_nofollow href='https://themumconundrum.com'> <img style='border: 1px solid gray;width:250px;height:250px;' src='https://themumconundrum.com/wp-content/uploads/2019/02/inlinkz-Its-OK-badge-2019.png'> <p style='align: center;'>The Mum Conundrum</p></a></span> Instructions: Select all code above, copy it and paste it inside your blog post as HTML

3.) Make sure to comment on the host’s post, the post before yours, and one of your choice

4.) Jacqui’s hosting this week, so she’ll comment on your post (along with other lovely linky joiners) and all five of us will of course retweet your post and share with all our followers.

5.) Tweet us (@TheMumConundrum @MamavilleTales @momof2lgs @twinstantrums@onemessymama4 ) with the URL to your post. Make sure you include the hashtag #ItsOK so that we know you’re tweeting us your linky post. If you don’t tweet us we might not see that you’ve linked up, so do make sure to give us a shout.

6.) Each week the host will choose her favourite post which will be featured the following week, retweeted and shared on facebook. If your post is featured as one of our favourites then you are very welcome to display our lovely ‘#ItsOK Featured Blogger’ badge on your sidebar.

Last week Helen hosted, and she chose the absolutely spot on 8 Reasons I’m not Temperamentally Suited To Parenting Young Children (Oh I do relate to this one!) Come grab your featured blogger badge Me, Them & The Others! What a fab post!! xxx


The Mum Conundrum <div style='width:100%;text-align:center;'><span style='margin:5px;padding:5px;border-radius: 5px;border:1px solid lightgrey;display:inline-block;'><a rel=_nofollow href='https://themumconundrum.com'> <img style='border: 1px solid gray;width:250px;height:250px;' src='https://themumconundrum.com/wp-content/uploads/2019/02/Its-OK-logo-featured-blogger-2019.png'> <p style='align: center;'>The Mum Conundrum</p></a></span> Instructions: Select all code above, copy it and paste it inside your blog post as HTML

Instructions: Select all code above, copy it and paste it inside your blog post as HTML

7.) Come and join our lovely Facebook group, and we’ll share your posts on there, as well as on the #ItsOK Facebook page – pop over to like and follow us where we’ll share the best posts from each week’s linky too.

8.) Are you on Pinterest? Come on over and follow our #ItsOK board, we’ll share your posts and you can plunder all the super-useful / funny / interesting reads and finds we amass too.

…See… it’s not that strict! You’ll definitely find that the more you put in, the more you get out, obvs.

And that’s it! Go forth and link! May your tea be drunk hot and your writing flow freely…

https://fresh.inlinkz.com/widget/b199ea9ed41c488d9e1f4520bac0d2c2

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

Comment

Name *

Website

By submitting this comment I agree with the storage and handling of my data by this website. I am aware that I may receive occasional email invites to subscribe to the Monthly UseLetter and other news from The Mum Conundrum (from which I can easily opt out at any time.) *

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.

Being pregnant while you have a baby already

Being pregnant isn’t easy as it is but damn it is near impossible when you already have a baby. I am currently 38 weeks pregnant and found out when my son was only 4 months old so I would be puking my morning guts up while he was crying in his cot and I would have to attend to him after. I have to say I have woke him up from naps due to my loud morning sickness as well.

Also I go through days of i cant be bothered to do this blah blah but now j is almost a year and his sleeping pattern is some what scattery I am usually awake at 4 even 3am when I have all the 3rd trimester problems of not sleeping well as it is so ill get about 4ish hours but the husband works and I have to get myself out of bed and tend to him make his bottles breakfast etc.

Another thing is the constant need to go to the toilet and now j is getting mobile it’s hard to leave jim so I have to constantly hold going to the toilet which starts me feeling crampy and if I so much as sneeze let’s just say leakage happens.

I will get this clear now im not exactly whinging about my life (much) I’m very grateful for my son and I can’t wait for number 2 to come I’m just saying how overwhelming it is when you have 1 and your having another

<div style='width:100%;text-align:center;'><span style='margin:5px;padding:5px;border-radius: 5px;border:1px solid lightgrey;display:inline-block;'><a  rel=_nofollow href='https://themumconundrum.com'>           <img style='border: 1px solid gray;width:250px;height:250px;' src='https://themumconundrum.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/10/Its-OK-logo-newest.png'>           <p style='align: center;'>The Mum Conundrum</p></a></span>

​Why i wont be the perfect mum

What i mean is yes i will let my child eat chocolate because it sometimes buys me time to calm him down while changing him and he likes it.

I don’t feel Ineed to be a perfect parent because i never will be. My child is loved and well cared for but I get bored playing with my child and sometimes in the morning when the husbands at work i just want to escape to the toilet or kitchen to get a couple of minutes of peace. 

I also am guilty of giving him my phone to play with or a tablet so he stays entertained so i can possibly get a bit of cleaning done or just sit their guilty on my phone and yes i do feel guilty that i sometimes don’t give him attention all the time but i think it would drive me crazy to have to constantly look after him and yes i love him to bits but I definitely need some time to just sit and do nothing 

Rant over..  

<div style='width:100%;text-align:center;'><span style='margin:5px;padding:5px;border-radius: 5px;border:1px solid lightgrey;display:inline-block;'><a  rel=_nofollow href='https://themumconundrum.com'>           <img style='border: 1px solid gray;width:250px;height:250px;' src='https://themumconundrum.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/10/Its-OK-logo-newest.png'> <p style='align: center;'>The Mum Conundrum</p></a></span>

What is in my christmas eve box

So the latest trend right now is the christmas eve boxes. It seems like everyone is doing them. So I decided to do one for my 10 month old son.

Here is what is inside it.

Paw Patro

l Cake mixcake-mix.jpg

I plan on making this with baby J on christmas eve even if he is a little too young.

£1.50 Sainsburys

 

 

 

 

 

 

Santa glass and reindeer plate

reindeer plate.jpgsanta glass

These are both for Santa on christmas eve to put the mince pie on and fill the glass with milk. I was thinking when J is older he can maybe have his christmas dinner on there.

Sainsburys both £1.50

Christmas jumper and reindeer hat

christmas jumper.jpgreindeer hat.jpg

These are both for J to wear on christmas eve. I bought them both just after christmas last year when they were reduced.

Asda jumper £4 hat £2.50

christmassy books

book.jpg

I bought 2 books for J one for christmas eve and one for christmas night.

Poundland £1

eBay £2.50

 

 

 

christmas comforter and blanket

snuggle.jpgblanket.jpg

J already sleeps with a comforter so I wanted to get a baby 1st one it took forever to find one and also a blanket to put over him in his pram that again says 1st christmas

eBay £4.20 for both

 

 

 

First Santa experience

So we took J to see Santa on Monday morning. I think I was actually more excited than J and definitely dressed him up for the ocassion in a little elf outfit and I wore a santa jumper. Let’s just say I bloody love Christmas so much and now I have an excuse to love it with J’s first one.

So we were actually the first ones in line and I was grateful for that I didn’t want to be waiting around ages being almost 30 weeks pregnant and it kept the hubby quiet.

So the one thing that was disappointing was the guy doing the tickets. Luckily J isn’t old enough to know about elves and santa but the guy was kind of miserable didn’t interact with the baby or child behind us he just took our names and we waited but then when we got into the grotto it was amazing. J was just looking around everywhere because it was all sparkly and purple and when we handed J to santa he didn’t cry or anything he seemed to enjoy being on Santa’s lap looking at the decorations and smiling at santa.

The santa guy was also really good he put in so much effort and made us feel so welcome and special it was such a magic experience for us and J and we got a couple of lovely photos to cherish out of it. J was also complimented on his elf outfit.

Overall the experience was amazing it was lovely for J to see santa for the first time and it was lovely that we were so welcomed and treated very lovely. The photos came out really nice as well.

What I have bought my 10 month old for christmas

Presents I have bought for my 10 month old baby

Buying for babies is tough isn’t it? You don’t know exactly what to buy them or if they will be a little too big for their present or if they aren’t advanced enough for it. So here is what I have bought my 10 month old baby for christmas.
I have bought J small things for his small Santa sack

The first thing was actually from Poundland. J absolutely loves Peppa and this book i think is christmassy even though it looks summery but this is for the stocking
book.jpg
Poundland £1

The second present for the stocking is this little hand held battery powered light that blows polystyrene balls and lights up. J has a similar one that was from Sainsburys for a fiver that made noise and lights up.

christmas wand.jpg media_133630372_Z
Sainsburys £5
Card Factory £2.50

The next thing in the stocking was actually something J liked at Rhythm time it is a rainbow coloured drum with a beater.

drum
Rhythm time website £16.97
Ebay from £2.99

J really likes chocolate so we have also bought him a 4 pack of Wispa’s. He only has a couple of teeth but he really likes chocolate.
Sainsburys Tesco supermarkets £1

Now I will move onto the main presents.
The first one is a christmas jumper. We bought this last year when the price went down just after christmas it is for 12 months

christmas jumper.jpg
Sainsburys £6
Asda £2

One of the big presents is an elephant popper. This is a really good present you put the balls into the elephant and then turn the ear and the balls will pop out the top and go back down to the elephant to start again. There is also little buttons to press at the bottom that plays rhymes.

elephant popper
Ebay £15ish
Argos £16.99
Smyths £14.99

The next thing is a my 1st christmas bear I wanted this for J’s christmas eve box but it doesn’t fit so I am making it one of the normal presents now. It is a little bear in a red top and if you shake it it has a sort of bell ringing sound.

1st xmas bear.jpg
Ebay £4
MoonPig £12 https://www.moonpig.com/uk/gifts/me-to-you-tiny-tatty-teddy-my-first-christmas-baby-gift/sft772/?utm_source=google&utm_medium=cpc&utm_campaign=GGL|Shopping|UK|NB|Gifts&gclid=CjwKCAiAlvnfBRA1EiwAVOEgfFMw86RyGgFvSfbthrn-KWsNA4WSJSXEyNti3WDVoTJ3r955GrCsJBoCt7wQAvD_BwE
Mamas and Papas £15 https://www.mamasandpapas.com/en-gb/soft-toy-my-1st-christmas-bear/p/485571000

Next up is an activity cube. This was bought at Sainsburys when they had their toy sale in September. It has lots of different sides with different buttons to press which light up and make sound.

activity cube.jpg

Sainsburys £17.99 originally £30
Argos £29.99
Smyths £29.99

This one is a bear that you press different parts of his body and he talks and sings. We got him in a sale at Sainsburys.

bear.jpg
Sainsburys £7.99 on sale
Argos £18.99
Smyths £14.99
Early Learning Centre £17.99

J absolutely loves our phones he loves pressing the screen and seeing things happen so we bought him a little Vtec smart phone that has a little mirror on it.

phone.jpg
Sainsburys £5 on sale
Smyths £12.99
Early Learning Centre £12.99

This next one is very simple and basic just really colourful rings different size that stack up on each other.

stacker.jpg
Sainsburys £3.99 on sale
Argos £11.00
Smyths £8.99

Last but not least this is a Fisher Price story book that you can turn the pages and they sing songs.

story book rhymes.jpg
Smyths £14.99
Very £14.99
Boots £16.99

Things I didn’t think I’d have to do

Here is a list of things I never thought I would have to do but have had to at least once because of the baby.

1.Pick someones nose

J has just got over a nasty cold filled will crusted bogeys (sorry) he obviously can’t do it himself so I have had to fish one or two out.

2.Hand pick soggy coco pops from someones neck

He opens his mouth for his next lot and because he hasn’t finished the first lot so he ends up with coco pops everywhere

3.Watch poo come out someones bum

Mid nappy change and he hasn’t finished going yet so you will literally see it coming out. (Sorry)

4. Clean out half eaten crisp from a pram

J is just getting used to more crisp kind of finger food he will hold and eat a long crisp and then drop it when it gets too small so half eaten soggy crisp ends up in the pram.

5.Hook food out babies mouth when he struggles to swallow it

So J is still getting used to some foods he struggles with any fruit that has a skin and sometimes chicken so he will just hold it in his cheek until you literally scoop it out with your finger.

Teething is a bitch

Teething is a bitch
This is a full blown rant about teething be warned!
So does anyone remember that thing called sleep? Wasn’t it amazing right? Well forget it baby J wakes up all through the night screaming until he gets some Calpol because we think his top teeth are coming through. This is any day of the week whether the hubby works the next day or I do we are both awake in the night dealing with J.
So no surprise that I am constantly tired no scrap that absolutely knackered and because J doesn’t nap as much as he used to we don’t get to catch up on any sleep we missed. I mostly feel like a walking zombie people must think I am stupid because I get asked things at work and it goes in one ear and out the other because my brain is too foggy to process it.
I do however praise the hell out of calpol one of the best inventions in the world. After J has calpol the screaming stops and I might be able to get a couple of hours sleep again hooray! but it doesn’t last long because a couple hours later we are back to stage 1 tired mum and screaming baby and I feel so helpless and then I get so grumpy and frustrated.
I love baby J to bits more than anything. He is mostly a happy lovely baby but sometimes I don’t love love him and then the guilt comes in and screws with my head. I do try to sympathize with him I mean sometimes it seems like he is in really bad pain but it is so hard to sympathize when you are so tired and have a screaming baby there that isn’t comforted by anything. Like I said isn’t teething a bitch?
Rant over..

Tales from Mamaville

Design a site like this with WordPress.com
Get started